BONDAGE

How strong is the bondage holding you between mom and dad, your love one, your children, your relatives, your teacher and etc…

Bondage cant be seen but felt in a way in any time, at any place without sign of coming or leaving. Why suddenly bondage came to mind? Sense of sensitivity of feeling his bondage felt while my eyes met him on first Syawal. The unwanted feelings, the way the eyes met and it stop there and send a shocking sense to my heart. After so many years I’ve shoved that feelings of remembering him as fond as I have before.

I quickly ran my eyes back to the dishes that were cleaned by me. Hating that feelings and shut it off immediately from my mind and not thinking about it at all but today it came back when he came to claim the twins to be in his guardian this afternoon. The spontaneous gesture I had to meet him always is by shaking his hand and kiss it just like we did while we were together.

Only loved one deserves that act from me or someone I highly respect. And today my wishful thinking brought Andrew back to life, back of my mind, showering my soul with tender and caring love. The nurturing eyes still lingered but with confused notion. The bondage I have between those people really coming back because of the accident gazing eyes with him on the first hari raya. I have been thinking lately is there a room for him to come back? A question that never get an answer from me. Its only his children that hold that bondage. Apart from that nothing is nurturing his love in me. None… I can just pass by, or even fly high. Considering anything in between? No, not yet!

Bondage that holds mom and dad to us is the love to bring us up, the milk that goes in out mouth when we were hungry, the care that dad show us when we fell down. Love was the keyword for bondage. And how bondage between friends works, relatives, family and etc?

At this hour my mind is still pacing and raging. Still fond to think of this silly issue. Is it silly ? No, it was not. Its something that people hardly look at. When we think mom and dad always scolded us because they hate us but the fact is they did that because they love us. And from they we know why are they doing that. Why am I really feeling this now? It is because I miss my twins already. Its only few hours since the father taken them. And now its only been 10 hours gone. I called them at 10pm and they are still playing and just had their dinner. While with me at that hour she’s already in her endless sleep.

I miss them so much now. I miss them saying “good night ibu, I love you” with tight hug and kisses. ARgh its going to be another agony till Wednesday night.

Date released: 081105 (1.26am) Currently listening: Mood : Missing heart Quote of the day: