My Special Inner Talks...

Penna : Lynna
Released: 300506
Mood: Missing in My Own Paradise
Currently listening: Biarkan Bulan Bicara Sendiri

Him who has come to me once. Him who has caught my eyes into fascination to look deep in his eyes. Him who has caught my desire to know more of him. Him who has been there for a short encounter having teens life fun, having to hold my hand, having to tease, having ease my mind with his smile. Him who has not talked much. Him whom once has fade from my life. Him who always called my names in his thoughts. Him who I longed to see even I have my half still. Him whom always giving me a hints to think of what he is doing while I am busy with work. Him whom had affects me with his short encounter has left deep remarks with his sense of loving and affecting me till now. Him whom I brought home during my courting years. Of all male encounter that I have, have not had a chance to know where I reside. I keep all my privacy only to myself except for him. To show him that how special he was to me. He is still now and will always will.

No matter how much I wanted to forget him, to hate him, to dispose him, he is still very near to me, very dear to me. Why? I don’t know. 15 years apart from his vision, his smell, his presence but he is still in my heart, my thoughts, my soul.

He stayed there longing for me to call, to see him and one day I really do make an effort to fight my inner feel to call him and talk to him. After few times dialing and putting it down at last, I did manage to talk to him. Lost in words, lost in space and lost in mind. He still was the same person I use to be, still have the same features, still have the same smell, still have the same eyes I love to see but the only different now is he has family that bond him with his sense of love.

He is still the man that I love 15 years ago, who has touched my heart deep. As much as I want to go away from him, he is still holding me in his mind, thoughts and heart. I’ve always missed him before, I do yesterday and I am still now. I’ve love him yesterday, I do still now and I will always love and wait for him. I yearn for his love, I yearn for his touch and I yearn for him to hold me. I know it is quite impossible but I do have him always in my dreams, thoughts and he stays in my heart forever.

To you abang,

I still do love you…

12.53pm